Pesto-churri/where the hell I have been

When you know, you know.

Every time I buy a bunch of cilantro or basil or flat-leaf parsley, I wonder what it might become. My grocery-shopping life is a bit like my writing life: I grab things and type things/save things based on intuition — by feel. I rarely have a plan for them, but I know I like them, and I’m confident, when the time is right, I’ll know what to do with them.

Those bouquets of herbs often start in a batch of guacamole, salsa, pasta. And then they’ll sit in my crisper drawer for a week. One day, when I find the motivation, I’ll pull out my food processor, dig through the pantry and transform whatever’s left of them into something I can only call pesto-churri.

Pesto? Churri?

Yes. And yes.

It’s like pesto but also like chimichurri: an herby blend of nuts/hard cheese, garlic, vinegar, seasonings and oil. Maybe toss in a dried Thai chili. Maybe half a jalapeno or some shallot. Definitely some leftover spinach or kale, if you have it on hand. Whizz it up, add more oil and/or vinegar as needed, et voila: pesto-churri.

The beauties of pesto-churri are many fold. It uses herbs and pantry staples that may (would) otherwise hit the trash bin, for one. For another, it’s DELICIOUS and makes everything it touches delicious, too.

Pesto-churri on baked potatoes. Pesto-churri on meats. Pesto-churri on eggs, pasta, salads, pizza, a spoon.

Pesto-churri doesn’t involve a recipe so much as a feeling (before you attack me, let’s remember this newsletter is $free). Maybe ratio is a better word. Herbs and greens are the bulk of pesto-churri. The nuts (peanuts are lovely if you can tolerate them, Marcona almonds or hazelnuts slap if you can afford them) and the hard cheeses (Parmesan, pecorino Romano, Grana Padano) can be used interchangeably to add umami. The seasonings and acids add character (red wine/apple cider vinegars keep it simple, or run wild with citrus vinegars, strawberry-rose vinegar, malt vinegar for a pesto-churri with fried fish — and don’t forget lemon/lime juice!). The garlic (it’s raw, so 1-2 cloves max or else it becomes garlic sauce (and that’s a recipe for another day)) adds buzz and backbone. The oil holds it all together.

If you want to be more on the pesto side of pesto-churri, start with a couple handfuls of herbs and greens, throw in a small handful of hard cheese, a slightly smaller handful of nuts, two cloves of garlic, an optional squeeze of lemon juice, a pinch of salt, black pepper, crushed red pepper and whir it all together in a food processor or blender, slowly streaming in the olive oil until it’s as coarse or fine as you like.

For something a little more on the churri side, start with those same two handfuls of herbs/greens, toss in a handful of nuts, a clove or two of garlic, a few tablespoons of your chosen vinegar/acid, salt, pepper, maybe a dried/fresh chili, maybe some dried oregano, then whir it up and stream in the olive oil until it looks and tastes spectacular.

If you absolutely cannot work without a recipe, fear not, that’s below. But first allow me to torture you with some personal news.

Wait … where the hell have I been?!

Great question. Longtime readers of this newsletter (lol, it launched in July) may have noticed it’s been MIA for a few months. I hope everyone had a lovely Valentine’s Day and a good Ramadan.

To answer my own question: Things have been hectic — good-hectic. In March, I attended my first AWP (Association of Writers & Writing Programs) Conference in Philadelphia. The in-person event brought together so many writing friends and colleagues, people I’d only known through Zoom classes and social media, people who apparently do have legs and bottom halves. In Philly, the fantastic Natalie Lima (one of the sharpest essayists of our time (seriously, read her asap)) gave me the opportunity to read from my memoir in front of a live audience as part of her Emerge event. People cheered (!!), and I did not die.

April brought a 15th wedding anniversary with this man who still leaves me in awe. It also brought a USA Today piece about the time in 2003 when I www.askjeeves.com’d if Rachel Bilson was Filipino (spoiler: she’s not) and about the importance of representation in an era of seemingly endless Asian hate.

April also brought my first-ever Food Network appearance: a guest-judge role on the new cooking-competition show “Big Restaurant Bet” with celebrity chef Geoffrey Zakarian. I got to do a lot of chewing and nodding and not much talking. It was fantastic. For a former med-school-reject-turned-line-cook who once worshiped Emeril Lagasse and Rachael Ray, this was a dream come true. I wrote about that for The News-Press when the show launched. You can find it on Hulu, Discovery+ or anywhere else that carries Food Network. I’m in episode four, along with some much more notable faces from around Southwest Florida.

OK fine here’s your recipe

Pesto-churri with Asian flair

Ingredients

1 handful (about 1 cup) of cilantro

1 handful spinach (if you have a ton of cilantro, you can use all cilantro; or sub basil, kale, etc.)

1/2 cup roasted peanuts (can sub almonds, pine nuts, hazelnuts)

1 dried Thai chili pepper (or 1/2-1 teaspoon chili flakes)

1 clove garlic

1 tablespoon fish sauce

2 tablespoons rice-wine vinegar (or fruit/citrus vinegar, or lime juice)

1/2 to 2/3 cup oil (peanut, olive, grapeseed, avocado all work)

Directions

Add all ingredients except for oil to a blender or food processor. Pulse 5-6 times to break down and incorporate the ingredients. Turn on processor/blender and slowly stream in the oil until the sauce is at your desired consistency.

This is a great flavor-punch for simple roasted chicken or steamed fish with rice. It’s also really good with eggs or as an add-on to ramen or pho.